 It’s
official – I have dry rot. I’m not talking about my wetsuit or my scuba
gear. I’m not even talking about my old body that may not be wearing as
well as it did when I was 30 years old. I’m saying I haven’t been diving
since the day after Thanksgiving. What is going on here? I live in
Florida – tropical sunsets, tropical breezes, Pina Coladas on the lanai
– why am I sitting here on this computer trying to figure out what to
say about diving this time of year?
I think it is sunspots – or maybe some alien life form that has
invaded Cape Coral and planted something in my brain that makes me think
I’m freezing all of the time. OK – I know you are thinking hormones, or
lack of them. Honestly, the fact that I wake up at 2 am (and 4 am and 6
am) and run to the freezer and try to fan those cool breezes on my body
has nothing to do with this. After all, it did get into the 30’s last
month. This is Florida!!! Did anyone forget to mention this when the
weather got very cold? Did LCEC understand that my cold body, under 3
layers of blankets, couldn’t deal with the temperature? Did they reduce
my electric bill because I am a Senior Citizen – I think NOT!
Anyway, the dry rot is setting in and I desperately want to write
this article after next week when we have signed up to go diving with
our buddies. Unfortunately, deadlines don’t always cooperate with
wishes. We are headed to the East Coast tomorrow – that is the other
part of Florida that we don’t like to talk about because of the traffic,
but they do have some nice dive operations that are willing to put up
with us. We’re headed to Ft. Lauderdale, or Dania Beach or one of those
other places that seem to run together in a place we call “The East
Coast”. We hope that the seas will be kind to us and that the sun will
be out to warm our chilly bodies after we come up from the dive. The
water temperature isn’t the real problem – the real problem is the fact
that when we get on the boat, we can’t soak up some of those hot sun
rays to get ready to jump back into water that is probably warmer than
the air.
We don’t own a boat – and that is another story that I don’t want to
explain here but if you don’t have a boat in SW Florida, you don’t
really dive often. There aren’t many dive operators and because you have
to go so far in the Gulf, it costs more than a trip to the Keys
(including hotel in some cases). Still… the Gulf is so luring. There is
so much to see and of course, those giant Goliath Grouper. Drop into the
water and find a 300 pound fish smiling into the lens of your camera –
you can’t do much better than that anywhere.
Still – we are headed to somewhere on the East Coast – it hardly
costs anything – we’re going to get wet – you just can’t argue with
that. I’m a wimp diver these days. I really don’t like drift diving – I
mean, I REALLY don’t’ like drift diving!!! But, that is what they do in
Dania Beach and Ft. Lauderdale. They throw you into the water yelling
“DIVE, DIVE, DIVE” and you can’t actually swim back to the boat to grab
your camera because the boat is already on the way to Bimini. Maybe I
exaggerate – well, of course I do or I wouldn’t be writing these
articles to begin with – but, honestly, do they have to be so MACHO? I’m
a senior citizen in some circles and I want them to cater to me. I want
to drop in easily and then swim back and get my camera. I don’t want to
watch the boat steaming north like the Titanic. I must admit that I
might spend a few moments admiring the youthful body of the Divemaster
of the week. And even better, if he figures out a way to get my camera
in the water without a flood, I will probably add a little extra to the
tip jar.
Basically, I just want to have a good trip. Get wet, not get too
cold, have great viz (100 plus is nice but I can deal with 20 or so),
find the reef or ledge, find a great photo, find the boat. I’m a happy
camper.
So, here it is February and I’m complaining. If I lived in Michigan,
Ohio, or any areas north of Tampa, I’d be thrilled that my underwear
didn’t freeze on the clothesline. I live in Florida – I want those
promises of paradise and tropical breezes. I want the sun to shine on my
body in between the dives and warm me up to get to the next beautiful
scene. I want the seas to be flat and the sun to set while I sip a glass
of Chardonnay after I’ve showered and viewed my shots for the day.
I want Paradise – is that asking too much?
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